Heard on NPR:

On Wait! Wait! Don’t Tell Me!

McCain said, ‘Obama has only been to the Middle East once before.’
To which Obama’s admirers replied, ‘Duh! That’s why they call it the Second Coming!’
xxx
True story:
Two thieves stole bedding from a store. They were apprehended behind the store a few hours later where they were discovered asleep on the stolen merchandise—one curled up on several pillows, the other in a hammock.